Not My Grandpa - Zoey Zimmer - Santa Cock Is Cu... May 2026

The movement is about recognizing that the rituals we inherited don't have to define the relationships we choose. And "Santa Is Cuffing Season" is about reclaiming the holiday as a time for adult romance, not just childlike waiting.

The comment section exploded.

For decades, the cultural script for the holidays has been painfully predictable. You go home, you see the family, you eat the casserole, and you listen to your grandpa tell the same story about the blizzard of ’78. In the world of entertainment and lifestyle content, the "Holiday Season" was strictly the domain of the wholesome, the vanilla, and the platonic. Not My Grandpa - Zoey Zimmer - Santa Cock Is Cu...

Zoey curates a "Not My Grandpa" watchlist: Die Hard (Santa is a hostage, not a hero), Bad Santa (the authentic anti-grandpa), and The Night Before (Seth Rogen as the reindeer). For the "Cuffing Season" vibe, she recommends Love Actually (but only the parts with the porn body doubles) and literally any Hallmark movie where Santa is played by an actor under 40. The Cultural Verdict Is Zoey Zimmer destroying Christmas? No. She is aging with it.

When your actual Grandpa asks why you didn’t sit on the mall Santa’s lap, Zoey recommends the "Smile and Redirect." Say: "I’m saving myself for the real Santa, Grandpa. The one who delivers after midnight." Your grandpa will be confused. Your cousins will high-five you. The movement is about recognizing that the rituals

Take the "grandpa" out of your aesthetic. Toss the needlepoint stockings. Burn the ceramic gnomes. Zoey’s lifestyle line (launching this November) features "Cuffing Season" ornaments: Santa handcuffs, a man in a red suit holding a martini, and a Christmas tree shaped like a bicep. "You can honor the vibe without honoring the blood relation," she says.

Enter .

Why? Because Zoey tapped into a specific, unspoken anxiety of the modern holiday season: the de-sanctification of the Santa figure. For older generations, Santa is a deity of joy. For Zoey Zimmer’s audience (20-somethings navigating life, dating apps, and student debt), Santa is a stranger who breaks into your house.